


While There's Moonlight and Music

by rabidchild67



Series: Wangst [5]
Category: White Collar
Genre: Break Up, Crack, F/M, Friends With Benefits, M/M, Talking Penis, Talking Vagina, What there's a talking penis tag and not talking vaginas?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-12
Updated: 2013-02-12
Packaged: 2017-11-29 02:27:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/681663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rabidchild67/pseuds/rabidchild67
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Neal's dick and Sara's ladyparts have a conversation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	While There's Moonlight and Music

**Author's Note:**

> It helps if you imagine that Sara’s pussy’s voice sounds like Anne Hathaway. I love casting the different body parts – it’s like the most twisted Pixar movie ever!

">“Oh, that, that…that was wonderful. Thank you,” Sara’s pussy whispered to Neal's dick; she positively cooed.

Neal's dick nestled closer against Sara’s pussy as Neal and Sara themselves cuddled together in Sara’s bed; they had just finished making love and lay together quietly, whispering to each other.

“Thank you, but a lot of the credit must go to Neal.”

“He does have a way,” Sara’s pussy allowed. “But you’re…” she struggled for the right word, “just lovely.”

“As are you, my sweet. As are you.”

Sara’s pussy sighed contentedly; she really liked Neal's dick a lot. They fit together well and he was very pretty and made her feel good about herself. If she were a person, she’d be in love. “What are they saying up there? Can you hear?”

Neal's dick strained upward gradually to check it out. “Aw, he’s petting her.”

“But what are they saying? I can never hear anything all the way down here.”

Neal's dick listened attentively. “Oh. Something about someone named Malcolm.”

 “Oh. Him,” Sara’s pussy said coldly. “He’s not very nice.”

Neal's dick moved back to its former position. “Who is he?”

“Her boss. He’s kind of a, well, I would usually say ‘dick’ in these situations, but I don’t want to offend you. Perhaps jerk is a better term.”

“No, no offense is taken. What did this Malcolm guy do?”

“They used to date. Sara really loved him, but he had eyes for another woman.”

“Oh, such a shame.”

“I know. She’s still in love with him. I worry about her – she’s been so upset.”

“I know what you mean. Neal is in love with Peter.”

“Really?” Sara’s pussy sounded surprised. She found love in all its permutations utterly fascinating.

“Oh, he’s going to kill me. I shouldn’t have said –“

“No, no. Don’t worry. I won’t tell. But isn’t he Neal's boss or something?”

“Yes, and that was just the problem. Peter’s dick pointed out that it was pretty risky for them to start a relationship. He’s always thinking ahead, Peter’s dick.”

“He must be very wise.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Well, he’s older. So, is that why Neal is with Sara?”

“Neal likes Sara,” Neal's dick hastened to point out.

”And Sara likes Neal. She says it’s like friends with benefits. But she _loves_ Malcolm. People make things so complicated.”

“I know.” Neal's dick and Sara’s pussy both sighed, deep in thought.

There was a sound _up above_.

“What’s that?” Neal's dick whispered.

“Ooohhhh…she, she’s cryyyyiiiing.” Sara’s pussy sounded on the verge of tears herself.

“Why? What is it? What’s the matter, my darling?” Neal's dick asked.

“Sh-she f-found out yesterday that M-M-Malcolm is getting married. I’m sorry, I’m sorry. When she’s upset, I’m upset,” Sara’s pussy sniffled.

Neal's dick, like Neal, attempted to soothe Sara’s pussy, nestling up against her comfortingly.

“ _There, there_ ,” Neal was saying. “ _It’s OK. Let me make it OK_.” He pulled Sara closer, nestling her face against his chest and resting his head atop hers. He made shushing sounds and kissed her hair.

“ _You’re sweet, thank you. But for now I just want to be miserable,_ ” Sara replied sadly.

Sara’s pussy continued to cry.

“Let me make it OK,” Neal's dick echoed. If he admitted it to himself, Neal's dick was a little in love with Sara’s pussy too – and he didn’t want to see her suffer.

“O-OK.” She sniffed. “Will you sing to me?”

Neal's dick plumped up a bit and he cleared his throat. “Hit it boys,” he said and his balls began to hum.

“There may be trouble aheeeead  
But while there's moonlight and music  
And love and romance  
Let's face the music and dance.”

“Oh, that’s lovely,” Sara’s pussy breathed. “Please go on.”  
  
There was a smile in Neal's dick’s voice as he continued,

“Soon  
We'll be without the moon  
Humming a diff'rent tune  
And theeeeen  
  
“There may be teardrops to sheeeed  
So while there's moonlight and music  
And love and romance  
Let's face the music and daaaance.”

“Oh, thank you, that makes me feel so much better. You have a lovely voice. I wish I could kiss you.” Her lips fluttered against him and she began to coo again.

“Oh, why…oh. OH!” Neal's dick said, getting harder.

Sara’s pussy giggled.  “Ready for another go?” she asked.

“Yes, I believe I am,” he replied.

Up above, Neal and Sara were kissing, and he laid her on her back.

“ _Ready for another go_?” Sara asked.

“ _I believe we are_ ,” Neal replied, nuzzling against her throat.

\----

Thank you for your time.

**Author's Note:**

> The song is “Let’s Face the Music and Dance” by Irving Berlin, as sung by Fred Astaire – such a great love song!


End file.
